Top 5 Reasons The Gaza Flotilla Will Go On Even Though Egypt’s Opening Rafah Crossing This Weekend

Egypt announced it will permanently open the Rafah border crossing this weekend. With Palestinians able to travel back and forth, and consumer goods already plentiful, you’d think the Free Gaza flotilla being organized in Turkey should be superfluous.

Think again. Here are the top five reasons the flotilla will go on.

5. Too many misogynistic Arab males and naive female internationals signed up for the Singles Boat with down payments.

4. Young activists planning humanitarian convoys to Syria, Cuba, and North Korea “need field experience and Palestine sounds cool and dangerous because it can be described as a war zone, but in reality it’s quite safe and has all the comforts that internationals want.”

3. Shopping!

2. As a result of a Hamas-Fatah compromise, moderate technocrat flotillistas holding honorary Palestinian citizenship will be eligible to join the PA national unity cabinet, live on the UNRWA dole, and claim their own “right” of return.

1. After declaring bankruptcy and converting to Islam, Lauren Booth can’t afford to reinvent herself.

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